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--
If you kill yourself here, we can't kill them over there --Crow (MST3K)

Believe in a fantasy world
|+| [link] |+|

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--
If you kill yourself here, we can't kill them over there --Crow (MST3K)

Believe in a fantasy world
|+| [link] |+|

DESU

--
If you kill yourself here, we can't kill them over there --Crow (MST3K)

Believe in a fantasy world
|+| [link] |+|

Well Heather, as much as I hate to admit it, there is one value you did teach me that I should have learned a long time ago. This is how to deal with rejection. I can say that any rejections I recieve in the future, whether it be in love or otherwise. I can probably deal with a good deal better. Does this mean I would have rather have learned this than go through the substantial amount of emotional pain and stress that came with it? Not really. All that aside, as much as you probably don't want to hear this, I still find it enormously difficult to even just think about talking to you. I'd go through what came with the breakup as a result, but I think I've made my point in previous posts or in information you recieved from other people. Put it in this perspective (And actually visualize how you would have handled it then when you and I were "completely in love" so to speak, not how you would handle it now), had I done the exact same to you, leave you for a better girl and disregard what you still felt at the time, how would you feel about me then? It's hard to talk to you and it will remain to be so from how I see it. Because it would be difficult to talk to the same person who brought unto you your first emotional breakdown, Sorry if this is something you don't want to hear, but I'm speaking my mind clearly and unabridged. Idon't want to talk to you because it reminds me of the hurt I suffered when you basically shattered to dust what I had given you. Sorry if that's not what you wanted to hear, but this is what I say.

To sum it up, have a nice life Heather.

--
If you kill yourself here, we can't kill them over there --Crow (MST3K)

Believe in a fantasy world
|+| [link] |+|

In regards to your comment Sasami-san, I just want to note that I do not indeed think that she is this is vulgar disgusting creature you're saying I think she is. Obviously she has a good side to her, I did fall in love with her at one point in my life did I not? The reason I don't talk to her is not out of spite that she decided to leave me. I'll admit that it isn't something that I at the time wanted, but it's an aspect of fate that I can not control. The reason I don't want to talk to her is because I don't want to reopen woulds I've already recieved in the past as a result of the first heartbreak. I talked to Heather several times after the breakup and I will say that it hurt tremendously to talk to her. Either of the things that she said or the fact that it was extremely uncomfortable to talk to her were factors in this. I'm back to normal finally and the last thing I want to do is end up going back into depression again as a result of opening up cuts I put a lot of effort into healing. I just want to be left alone. It really isn't that much to ask.

Perhaps quoting a verse from the song "Hurry Go Round" by Hide could help elleviate this somewhat.

doko-ka kanata o me sashi
sugita kioku ashige ni
kanashii wake ja naku
demo ureshiku mo nai

Translated, it means

I head for a place far away
leaving my memories as footsteps
it's not that I'm sorry
but I'm not particularly happy

Forgive me for rambling. I know that resolving issues can often times be helped by facing them, but it's a risk. A risk I'd rather not take.

--
If you kill yourself here, we can't kill them over there --Crow (MST3K)

Believe in a fantasy world
|+| [link] |+|

If her just feeling bad about it is expecting me to forgive her, you're mistaken. I was seriously about to commit suicide, as in, end my life, as a result of her and the heartbreak. If it wasn't for my friends who helped me bring back my virtually zilch self confidence and esteem, I probably would have done it too. Have someone screw you over so much to the point where you want to die, then talk to me. Until then, please leave me alone.

--
If you kill yourself here, we can't kill them over there --Crow (MST3K)

Believe in a fantasy world
|+| [link] |+|

All I have to say is, you would have been much better off leaving me alone....

--
If you kill yourself here, we can't kill them over there --Crow (MST3K)

Believe in a fantasy world
|+| [link] |+|